Drilling? Why is there drilling? What trauma had this person experienced in their childhood that has caused them to believe they need to punish the greater society by working their power drill so early in the morning? Wait, what? It’s 11am, much later than I thought. A crack through the blinds has allowed the sun to penetrate the cacoon I have created on the office floor. I can no longer decompose here. My mouth is dry. It’s 40 degrees inside already and I need water desperately fast if my brain is to stand any chance to recall the events of last night in any comprehensible, defendable manner. If someone is going to attack you for your actions it’s best advised to know which accusations are based in reality. Last night was the Heads Will Roll office Christmas party, which from here on will be known as Santa’s Revenge.
Surely there is more to Christmas than this? Here at Heads Will Roll we have decided to present to you our Christmas recommendations. We want to bring to you some activities that will put you in the Christmas spirit but won’t end with you scrubbing hysterically in a shower of freezing cold water because you “won’t ever be clean again”…
Nothing says Christmas more than act of sitting around and achieving very little from the comfort of your own couch. Place any one of the following movies into your DVD player to surprise friends and on lookers with your festive spirit.
Heads Will Roll’s Top Christmas MoviesDie Hard
Bruce Willis bleeds, shoots, smokes and swears his way through this delightful Christmas romp. Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker!
Bad Santa
What says Christmas more than shopping centres, a midget and an alcoholic Santa with a fetish for butt sex?
National Lampoons: Christmas Vacation
Because watching the Griswold family celebrate has to make you feel better about your own family gatherings.
Trading Places
Eddie Murphy at the top of his game, Princess Leia’s boobs and conniving old millionaires.
Christmas is often celebrated by the giving away of presents. What’s our favourite kind of giving at Heads Will Roll? Our favourite kind of giving is where we get to give to people at no real effort to our selves. In that spirit we would like to direct you to some online advent calendars. The first is the inthemix.com advent competition calendar, which can be found here. Each day of the month reveals an entry into a different competition, some awesome, some not so, but hey it’s free stuff and you can enter as many of the competitions as you want straight away so quit your complaining. The next advent calendar we’ve discovered is from Turbo Records, which can be found here. The Turbo boys are doing their advent calendar correctly so with each new day of the month you can download a new surprise. Some of these surprises have been pretty amazing, such as a brilliant reworking of a Beatles track by an unannounced Turbo artists, strange videos and cool remixes.
Finally we would like to share a song created by one of our Heads Will Roll staff. If this can’t get you into the Christmas spirit then we’re sorry to say you just may be a little bit dead inside.
Merry Xmas Bitches.mp3
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